Welcome to the Platformer where we talk about games in an extremely amateur but fun way! This post is in regards to my Metroid (me) & Vania (girlfriend) series where I introduce my girlfriend to video games! Vania gets drugged and is forced to do my favourite thing…puzzles.

VR has done what colour has done to art. It’s made worlds that were merely foggy and at arm’s length, via a controller, real. Is it a gimmick? In some cases yes, but do you remember when controllers had number pads on them? (I mean I don’t but they did). Those were just early versions of a good idea, not perfect. This was VR without motion controls to fully immerse you. Statik makes you hold on to the controller and replaces it with a puzzle in such a convincing way that Vania indicated with her entire body, she forgot that she had full control of her appendages.

Statik has the player waking up in a nondescript room with nothing but a box incapsulating the player’s hand.

In real life, the player is holding the Dualshock 4 controller where every button, trigger and general squishy bit affects the in-game box. With nothing but pure intuition, the player must utilise their surroundings to unlock the box in a vague hope to gain freedom.

“The game was something completely different for me. I had only ever played on VR once before. It was intriguing and it challenged my brain in a new way.”

Vania in awe and disbelief at her lack of intuition. Good thing she didn’t see me play.

Vania has an issue with game immersion. She’s never felt truly connected to a character on a gameplay level, considering her favourite character is Kratos that might be a good thing, but Statik you don’t play as a character. For all intents and purposes you are trapped in a room with a weird pixelated face in a white coat. Does that sound unnerving? It is and Vania was happy that I was around, even if I felt more like her conscience than the drop-dead sexy boyfriend I am.

The game goes to extreme lengths to immerse the player such as creating a blurred vision, awakening the player instead of merely teleporting the player like so many other VR titles. Normally Vania has to have sex with me to feel dazed and light headed. (I bore her to sleep)

The following is a performance review for Vania as she completed the puzzles since she said she felt like being back in school:

• Controlling the Box: B – She understood quickly that they key to success was experimentation. Figuring out what each button on the controller did and trying various combinations. However, due to her unfamiliarity with controllers, she kept forgetting which button she pressed. Resulting in a cycle of abuse to my poor little controller.
• Adapting to new levels: A – She acclimated extremely well to new environments and was eager to move on and find the solution.
• Determination: C – Puzzle games require persistence and a level of bashing your head against the wall. Vania, perhaps due to my presence, kept just asking for the solution. This may be because her loves of games aren’t quite there and are just playing them for me.

Overall she did great, the only issue being her lack of will to finish if she’s not 100% in like she was during her time with God of War.

Vania thoroughly enjoyed her time with Statik since she loves a good brain teaser, I made sure of it on our first date. However, I can see that it is starting to become laborious and she is starting to enjoy it less and less. Games I mean, not what you were thinking. She would recommend this, as long as you don’t mind being stared at 24/7, as it’s a unique experience. As long as you have someone there to give you a subtle nudge through the puzzles.

I’m going to give my girlfriend a time to rest from the onslaught of her video game enthusiast of a boyfriend. However, I have been battling with one of my friend’s Z in…

Pokemon Sword

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